Watching/Reading/Playing

Maybe I’m in a mood since life is kinda curving on me ATM but most of y’all need to chill and enjoy art.

It all started when I started seeing all the negative backlash for “Wuthering Heights” and the anti-fun Saltburn haters started yipping again. I’ve just been waiting for a moment to talk about Saltburn, and now feels right. Just for reference, I think Saltburn is one of the best movies from 2023 and it’s not even close. Do I like it because it has deep themes and an interesting take on class politics? No! It doesn’t have any of those things! But it is a fun as hell story to watch unfold.

One of the most interesting critiques of Saltburn is that it looks like it was made for TikTok….bitch, what movie isn’t these days!? There are tons of movies that are made for TikTok and still choose to look uninteresting. Why are are we bashing a movie for looking different? As much as I love knocking The Substance¹ I at least applaud it for choosing to have a visual style. I have yet to hear a convincing argument why Saltburn’s visuals are less valuable than any other movie that tries to have a style.

Speaking of The Substance, a movie people were shitting themselves over, its story was simpler than most Family Matters episodes. Tell me, who heard the premise of The Substance and did not instantly know what was going to happen? As soon as, as soon as the premise is introduced, anyone who has seen a movie before knows exactly where the story is going. You know that Sue is going to fuck over Elisabeth. It doesn’t take years of film school to know how cookie cutter this plot is. Hell, there are probably two dozen episodes of Star Trek with the same plot outline. Now, be honest, did anyone predict the ending of Saltburn once you learned the premise² ? I would bet; no, much less even the twists and turns the story throws at the audience. How is this not considered better than watching a trope filled boiler-plate sci-fi plot?

I shit on The Substance to outline just how comforted critical audiences are by tropey movies. While The Substance was nominated for 5 academy awards³ , Saltburn was nominated for nothing. I’m going to catch some shit for this but I think it’s because Emerald Fennel is an auteur. She has an approach to film that isn’t concerned with the audience, she is making movies she wants to see. I accept that even though I didn’t like Promising Young Woman, she made the movie she wanted to make no matter how cringe it was to watch. The Substance is nothing but a vehicle to present a message to the audience. Just to show I’m not biased to toward hating The Substance, the movie We Need to Talk About Kevin does the exact same thing. Though it has all the hallmarks of a good movie, style, acting, blocking, editing, all superb, it’s story is lacking any depth beyond it’s message.

Another item that people are throwing at “Wuthering Heights” is that Emerald is unhealthily in love with Jacob Elordi. What the actual fuck does that mean. She wants to have sex with him? You, me and 250 million other people, sister! Does that mean she shouldn’t cast him in her movies? It’s a common fact that Quentin Tranatino wrote himself into a movie just so he could suck on Salma Hayek’s foot. This critique reeks of sexism.

All this to say I haven’t seen “Wuthering Heights” yet but I’m already annoyed by the conversation around it. Least interesting to me is how it apparently does not stick close to the themes of the book. Ok? The title is literally in quotations. We are so obviously getting Emerald Fennell’s movie, not an adaptation and I absolutely love that. Say it was a faithful adaptation, what value is that? The book already exists, read it.

I may hate her “Wuthering Heights”, but I don’t think I’ll walk away from it thinking “well that could have been directed by anyone.” Be sure to check my Letterboxed for when I do finally see it.

This moves us into the second topic of discussion about people not being able to enjoy stuff because they need everything they engage with to reflect their values.

Mewgenics (god even the title can't chill lol) hasn't left the #1 top-seller spot on Steam since it dropped and better than 90% of people playing have have no idea this game is even controversial. I had no idea until I read a piece from one of my favorite newsletters, Garbage Day.

The piece goes on to tie this game into the current rise of of liberal backlash to the right wing man-o-sphere in the form of “Dark Woke.” This is….quite a stretch. The article itself identifies that Mewgenics developer Edmund McMillen has always had a juvenile sense of humor and even points out that the game was in development long before Gamergate. I’m not saying that this gives McMillen a pass on never maturing his tastes but at least the dude is consistent (if not stunted).

I have played a lot of the Binding of Isaac (McMillen’s last game) and my least favorite things about that game is everything but the gameplay. The art style is ugly (read: charming), the humor is mostly fart and pee jokes and the “story” is depressing af. Did I take this personally? Should all art make me comfortable and affirm my views? No. Stop seeking validation in things you consume!

So back to the big “controversy” of the voice cast. When digging even an inch below the surface you will find that the voice acting is just “Featuring Meows from”. So the statement from the Garbage Day piece that says “The final list of voice actors includes mortal enemies, convicted felons, empty provocateurs, and Rivers Cuomo.” is just being unfair and deliberately obtuse⁴ . These “actors” aren’t even speaking the human language, they’re doing the equivalent of a Wilhelm Scream that could be attributed to anyone. It’s even less sincere when you see the other names in the cast, such as beloved internet illuminary: hbomberguy, Iconic 80’s comedian and director Bobcat Goldthwait and the entire RedLetterMedia cast of hosts. So, if you can pinpoint which actor is meow-ing at any giving moment in the game I’ll give you a firm handshake and a pat on the back before you go get your state mandated lobotomy.

The point of the matter is: If the game wasn't good things like "dark woke" and "edge lord" humor would not matter to the thousands of normies picking it up.

Enjoy movies, enjoy games, enjoy books even if you don’t agree with their politics. Yes, it’s great if you think critically about these things but (For the folks in the back) YOU DON’T HAVE TO INTERNALIZE EVRYTHING YOU CONSUME.

Other Notables

** Jesus and that fish thing

** I could care less about the NBA but I love the petty attention to detail over a story that ultimately matters to less than 1k people.

** God I miss Quake Live 1v1s

1  Don’t worry I will later.

2  Of course you did, great job, you win the movie, gold star.

3  Including best director, wtf.

4  The monoculture is dead. You cannot give me a list of 100 “internet celebrities” and expect me to pick out convicted felons. A little context would be nice to make your point.